This is a blog of love, a blog of hope, a blog of freedom. There is no perfection here..just me.

TWLOHA ROCKS!!!!
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I first heard about TWLOHA in the fall of 2006. At that time I had been battling self harm for almost 7 years of my life, it was more than a release, it had become a part of me, it was who i was, "a cutter". When I heard Renee's story through Jamie, the tears instantly came, I was overwhelmed with this feeling of hopefullness, this feeling that maybe I could walk away from cutting and that for once in my life maybe i could control it instead of it controlling me. The year is now 2009 and I'm happy to say that TWLOHA has done more than affect my life, it has helped me believe in rescue and hope, love and joy, that my story does matter, that we aren't meant o fight alone and thats why we have eachother. Self Injury is so foreign to people, they automatically label you as a freak, TWLOHA has overstepped that boundry, they've spread the awareness and have taken the labels away. Today I am free from self harm and I've never been so happy to be alive.

In Love,
Laura

Don't you hate how life can be going so good for you and then bam you get hit my something that completely knocks you down and shatters your life...

Let me explain a little bit, i dont remember very much of my school years i was a little out of it...no i wasn't on drugs or anything like that i just didn't pay much attention to it..but  i met Jonathan when i was 13..he was in my english class and his mom was a new teacher at my school. His brother Billy and I became instant friends, we always hung out together..me and Jonathan were close too and he used to always have a thing for walking me to class...he was younger than I was and he was in junior high meaning we only had one class together and somehow my classes were always on the way to his classes..haha...
His sister Suzanne was like my best friend, she was the first to introduce me to black lipstick and dark clothes...

They moved a year or so later and we still tried to keep contact as much as possible but it wasn't the same, I found out recently that Billy is engaged to one of my best friends Maria and that he is living in the next town over now..which was surprising but good...

The worst news hit me today...Jonathan 17 years old..hung himself on Jan. 4th, 2008..he had gotten into some legal trouble, shot a guy over a girl and was facing up to 30 years in prison if convicted....

my heart sank today when I heard the news...I couldn't believe what was happening to me, her I had just saw him a few months ago, exchanged emails a few times but other than that we kind of lost touch...and now he's gone...

I can't deal with this right now...

I dont know what to say

I dont even know what to do...

So it's only the 1st day of the new year, and I feel like its already going bad. First off I got called into work which is ok, I dont mind that, I love my job, there's just other stuff that is going on as well. I lost my best friend today, not to suicide or death or anything, we just can't be friends anymore, its bringing both of us down, and its mainly because I'm not a cutter anymore, and she still is, and it seems if im not cutting or wanting to off myself that she hates me or something. My best friend Aaron who I"ve gotten pretty close to lately left at 3 am this morning to go to Australia for at least two years, possibly longer to do some work with youth with a mission...I dont know it just seems a little discouraging, but I guess I'm going to have to live with it. Not let it get to me.

I'm Fine..really I am..I didn't mean to drop off the face of the planet for a few days but my work schedule has been crazy. So to all of you who have flooded my voicemail and inbox with "love notes"...dont worry I'm OK...

So i work today but then im off for an amazing 4 days..Thank You Jesus....

I've been trying to get some stuff together for a few families that im helping out with some things, and well its been hectic especially with my work schedule and such. I really am thankful for Jesus and the love he has shown me.

So I'm really surprised that I can still recite 1st Corinthians 13 without messing up...sometimes I really do amaze myself.

It's New Years Eve and I have to work tonight but I'm still excited. It's a New Year starting in 11 hours and 4 minutes. The countdown is on. I can't wait. Oh and good news, I'm celebrating something today...but I'll have to share that one later...

Love you all..

Laura